Tag: lifeblog

The choice is mine and yours to make.

Photo by Javier Allegue Barros on Unsplash

The choice is mine and yours to make,
To react or respond is a choice we can make,
To dwell or move on is a choice we can make,
To be kind or not is a choice we can make,
Because the choice is mine and yours to make.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

To blame or accept is a choice we can make,
To protest or suppress is a choice we make,
To defend or offend is a choice we can make.
Because choice is mine and yours to Make.

Photo by Vladislav Babienko on Unsplash

To hold tight or let go is a choice we can make,
To be sad or happy is a choice we can make,
To learn or unlearn is a choice we can make,
Because choice is mine and yours to make
Remember, even not making a choice is a choice we make!

Love and Light

Bindu

Featured

What I learnt in the past few weeks Courtesy -COVD19

The last few weeks have been stressful and it only gets worse by the day. Innumerable Whatsapp forwards, each publication chasing readership numbers and news channels wanting higher TRP. Media is making their own life interesting and ensuring ours is exactly the opposite- Fearful. Every day I would wake up and google for “Corona update” and then read all the news and feel fear bubbling inside me. Finally, I decided to put an end to this pandemic in my life, remove it from my head. I haven’t looked up the news in the last 48 hours and it feels so good.

I am not being ignorant, I have accepted that there is something tiny(in size) compared to us in the world capable of wiping us off the planet. I am aware that it can harm us and I also know what it has been doing and many channels already shared the future projections. I am certain I will get an update on my timeline when there is a breakthrough in the vaccination. For now, I am enjoying my time and these are my discoveries/learnings:

  • I am more in touch with family and friends, I feel the bonding which was missing for long. I think social distancing took people away physically but brought them closer in our hearts. These are times we should be thankful for technology no?
  • It is another reminder that life is short. One second we are all in Lala land and another there is a virus which can destroy us. So life is short irrespective of the coronavirus. If we don’t love ourselves and our loved ones now then we will never. 
  • Awareness that life is all about “change” deepened for me. It’s all about ups and downs, whichever direction we go in we have to return to the other way and in reality, nothing is permanent and it shall all change. The only reality is Change. 
  • I decided to make reading positive reinforcement books/articles a part of my daily life and I am enjoying the process. My current read is Be Here Now – Baba Ramdass
  • I discovered that my word now is “pause” something I haven’t dealt with elegantly all my life as I am in a rush to finish things. Now I decided to lose the rate race and win the moment!
  • I started appreciating life and myself more. 

I am learning more and enjoying the pause even though at times this situation is unbearable, I remind myself this too shall pass. I hope and pray that this pandemic instills a positive attitude in people along with hygiene. My heart goes to all the people who have lost their loved ones, I wish that hadn’t happened. I wish strength and awareness to the rest of us to let go of fear as fear kills faster than Corona does.

I wish you well! My prayers:

May everyone be free from Suffering,
May everyone be Healthy,
May everyone be at Ease,
May everyone be Happy

Love and Light!
Bindu

Life should come with a label “limited time offer!”

Image Courtesy – Google

It was just another day for me, doing my mundane chores. Keeping myself busy and then a beep on my WhatsApp app shattered me. I was heartbroken to read about Sridevi’s demise. I have several reasons for this as the Diva left me with a lot of learnings. I feel unsettled; I feel uncomfortable as I am reminded that life is uncertain and death is the only certainty for us humans.

She looked gorgeous, she looked fit, she had her stardom and a happy family, and all this is what we saw or what was visible to us on social media. I know they are stars and have to keep up with the glamour world. I understand that the competition is too high and I may not even have kept up to 54 if I was her. She was very young, and all this was all too fast, I wonder how her family will come to terms with this loss. I wish her soul rests in peace .

I grew up watching her; she is one woman who has made me laugh in movies. I somehow was unknowingly connected to her I guess, though I haven’t watched all her films. Never have I made any effort to follow her on social media, yet the news was heartbreaking. I was wondering why did it hurt me?

It taught me life is short and how short no one knows. We must be prepared to embrace death any moment.

I realized I am conditioned to keep away from the subject “death”. I was always discouraged from discussing death because it is not positive. Alas!I learned that it is the only confirmed event in our life and hence has to be openly spoken about. I searched for talks on death last evening and watched them on ted.com(There are some interesting ones if you are interested)

I learned that fitness or nothing we do would guarantee a long life. I have innumerable limiting beliefs I became aware of in myself. It struck me that the only thing that matters is if we lived our life to the fullest when we breathed our last. When it is the time, we have to leave.

I became aware that we are all a spec of dust and can vanish in no time. However BIG we are in the society we are not indispensable, and life goes on.

I realized that living with the thought that we are here for a limited period might snap us out of our past(which is over) and maybe help us stop brooding over the future(which is uncertain).

I realized all I want is to be remembered as a woman who lived her life to the fullest and someone who loved her laugh lines.

I realized that yesterday is in my mind and tomorrow is again a game of the brain and all I have is just the present moment. The fact is in most cases we are fine now yet unhappy because of the thoughts we carry. All the negativity and pain are in mind.

I learned that I am running out of time and the fact is nothing can tell us how much time are we left with.

I realized rules stop us from living; society is in my mind. It’s my life, and only I can live it. Finally, I die alone.

Procrastinating will only ensure I am dead soon as time waits for none as that word stops us from living life.

Laugh out Loud – Love yourself – Live Life is the only way to be happy and the only way we can spread happiness.

Many more thoughts and realizations occurred to me in the last 24 hours. Sridevi left a message loud and clear for me, and I will always be eternally thankful to her. What if I don’t wake up tomorrow morning? Will I have regrets for things I left undone? Will I have a happy story or a sad one in my timeline when my life flashes in the last moment? So here I am making my best efforts to live now.

Do you agree that we have limited time or are you still willing to live like death doesn’t exist? Do you believe that not talking about it will evade it? If today was the last day of your life what are the things you will do? You may want to think.

I wish you a happy life!
Bindu

 

 

It’s now or never!

 

193698-Elvis-Presley-Quote-Tomorrow-will-be-too-late-it-s-now-or-never

Image courtesy- Google

I just heard the sad news about the demise of someone I know, whose laughter still rings in my ears. It got me thinking, how fragile are we. Controlled by this breath and with no control in our hands. While we believe we own everything but in reality we have nothing. Not all that we earned, not all the accolades and not even our own body. It all belongs to this earth, and we go wherever we do with nothing accompanying us. Will we carry memories I wonder? Will happy memories keep us alive up there? How I wish someone could answer this for me.If not that, I will be content to leave this planet with no regrets, is that too much to ask for I wonder?

Of late I have had this realization that we human beings are all so optimistic. We do not believe in pessimism at all. Before you analyze that statement I made, I will explain this further. We are all planning our future. What we will do next year or in the next five years, how we will settle for good in x years, how we will focus on life in x years and so on. We are busy rushing away with the present as we are looking forward to that tomorrow which may not even exist. How are we so confident then? Are we all in a kind of coma? We know we might not survive the next second yet we are ok to fight with our loved ones and sleep angry. We don’t have an expiry date yet we plan what we do after we retire. We let go of everything we have now for that tomorrow that doesn’t even exist. No one in this universe can assure us of the next moment, yet we do what we are good at, living for tomorrow. If this isn’t called optimism then what is?

The sad news, accidents, calamities, deaths shudder me. There are so many talks, messages, forwards, posts on social media which scream at us that this is the only moment yet we are in a race inside our mind and are willing to gamble all that we have for an unknown tomorrow. Does tomorrow exist? Why are we programmed this way? Why don’t we live the now and live it to the fullest being aware that tomorrow might not even be there? Why can’t we be with our loved ones to our heart’s content now? Why do we plan to live to our heart’s content “x” years from now?

Does life have a way of making us realize? I recollect reading a message in which the lord of death Yama comes to the wealthy man to take him away, and he had millions of rupees, but none of that could buy him a second. I repeat, the money couldn’t buy him even one second.

That brings to my quest, In a fragile life like ours, shouldn’t we enjoy every second of it with people we love the most? Listen to them, speak to them and love them to our heart’s content? Express all that we should now and not wait until tomorrow? Live life like there is no tomorrow? I wish we all can…

This very moment, I want you to know that you have touched my life in some way or the other, else you wouldn’t be reading this. I hope and pray that you become aware of this reality that all we have is now. Like the saying goes its now or never.

Happy Living!

The clouds 

IMG_1046
I saw mountains covered by clouds one morning and got thinking . Clouds , Aren’t they like our thoughts and emotions ? They move constantly . They have the ability to make us believe there is nothing beyond them . Hadn’t I seen the mountain range earlier in Sun I wouldn’t have ever guessed that there could be another island beyond those beautiful clouds  . Our eyes believes what it sees and doesn’t question most times especially when it is right there in front of us . Similarly when we are in stress , anxiety , negative emotions we can’t fathom that there is life beyond that . We are stuck . We stare into the problem and make it bigger and forget there is horizon beyond. We don’t want to think anything beyond the problem and we believe that it will stay with us for life though we know life is all about impermanence(subconsciously ) . Be it the weather , traffic , relationships , health or  practically anything .While the reality is that the cloud moves , it makes patterns , it reveals sun and blue skies , it unveils beautiful islands and mountains . What is needed to see the beauty? Patience says my mind. Patience to look ahead and wait . Belief that they are clouds and are temporary and they will move and make way for better views . Trust that this theory won’t go wrong even if we shut our eyes and refuse to believe because Nature’s rule never changes . There is day after night.
I wish you loads of patience in life
Stay happy!
Bee

Detachment is the best attachment – part 1 and 2

I am a very emotional soul, most things that happens around me affects me. Be it the news paper, tv or anyone in trouble . Need I then say about my loved ones? I have been thinking of how to be detached yet attached ? how not to react or get affected for that matter. How to lets say “just be” .

I understand we humans have a brain which is faster than a super computer and is capable of processing a zillion thoughts in a day or should I say an hour? Attached to the zillion thoughts are a zillion emotions ! we are a wreck already aren’t we ? The realisation that I am allowing those zillion emotions of someone who matters to me to affect me was a mind boggling realisation . Now occurs a question if the emotions of another person or their actions is affecting me who has the control on my emotions really ? is it me or them? i meant to ask who has my remote control ? The awareness that I am a prisoner of others thoughts is so scary and so is the fact that my life could become a roller coaster ride all day .. In this quest I found a lot of answers after reading , after deliberation and I wanted to share my learning with you all 🙂

I realised that others emotions affects me because of the “ME” mode I live in. Lets call it a “ME ” filter considering that this is the era of filters . Let me not digress , so we end up looking at all that is happening around us through the “Me” filter . We think we are the centre of the universe and all that happens is for us , aiming at us because end of day its all about “ME”.

Let me try explaining this further . Hmm lets say a friend is having a bad day at work and comes to meet me in a foul mood. And I ask her, so how was your day and she will answer me rudely. Now, what happened here ? She answered me from her space of frustration and thats all . But how did I decipher it? She is so rude to me . I waited for this meeting the whole day , I planned , I took an initiative , I always care and this behaviour is unacceptable . She is so insensitive and doesn’t respect me , I dont deserve such a behaviour. I am now offended , sounds familiar isnt it? Imagine that’s a spouse or a partner now 🙂 the impact is even deeper. Because there is love in the relationship .

Now did she mean to be rude to me ? Was that an intent? Well honestly the answer is no! It was their response from their experience with no intent of hurting us. But wait! isnt it about the ME filter ? What did I finally become here? A victim could we say ? It was not their direct reaction to us right? Similarly if someone else gets angry or is rude its more about them and not us. Its about their inability to cope up, their weakness, their expectations and their struggle but definitely not “Me”

Finally who is the culprit here ? The ME filter! We tend to take or have conditioned ourselves to take others words and actions as their personal judgement of us . So their unhappiness is ours , their anger is ours, their happiness is ours so who is controlling life here ..I finally realised the need to live my life my way and not anyone’s way and figured out being aware Is the first step .

Perspectives is the only way to tackle the “ME” filter. Let me explain this further may be with an example.

My partner was very rude today .

“Me” filter : He is so rude. I love him so much . He doesn’t care. There is no point doing anything for him. Its a waste . I don’t deserve this treatment ..

“Partner Filter “ : He is rude today because he is having a bad day. It has nothing to do with me. It is his way of venting out and getting normal. I should just let him be.  At this moment his state of mind is most important for him.

“Our Filter” : He is rude because he is having a bad day.  It has nothing to do with me. I shouldn’t take it personally. I should may be console him and make sure he feels better or if he likes to be left alone I will give him space . But I will ensure that I share with him how I felt and find out better ways of coping up and being respectful of each other when he is ok.

“Our Filter” covers all involved both of us in this case and is always the best way compared to the “Me filter” . Viewing the instance or a situation from this filter will sort out most issues .

Practise makes a man perfect so its important to start using the “our filter” every time we realise someones words or action is affecting us . Its ok to forget the filters but being aware and trying to use it later will help making this a way of thinking for us. Once we calm down this works even better . The more we are aware, the more we practise ,the more we learn. The more we detach, the more we are happy . So lets embark on this journey of filters, what say?